


Burns

by liveforjjae



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Self-Indulgent, Short One Shot, letting go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-18
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-27 10:47:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30121590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liveforjjae/pseuds/liveforjjae
Summary: But the heat can be overwhelming until it borders on pain. Being too close to the fire gives him burns and Jaehyun tolerates it, but itburns.
Relationships: Lee Jaehyun | Hyunjae/Lee Juyeon
Kudos: 9





	Burns

**Author's Note:**

> my second fic! i felt like writing angst but i still hope you enjoy reading this <3

Jaehyun was the type of person who would hold on to the things that he loves. Be it his favorite book from his childhood days that is carefully placed on his bookshelf at their house on Incheon, an antique clock that his grandfather owns and given to him as a present on his thirteenth birthday, bright smiles of his friends perfectly captured and frozen in time on the polaroid’s that is pasted on the walls of his apartment, those things that he loves that he would never let go no matter what. 

But there are instances, he thinks and knows, that would be too much for him to bear and sometimes leads him to letting go. And Jaehyun tries, even if it pains him, he clung to _him_ like his life depended on _him_. He would bear the nights that is dreadfully cold with the once familiar warmth on his side, gone. He wasn't good at handling the cold but he holds on. _As long as he always return to my side, everything's all right_ , Jaehyun would repeat this on his head like a prayer that would somehow ease the voice that screams on the back of his mind that nothing is really all right. It works and drowns all these thoughts and it would pass, but it still lingers. All of this he does because of the man that he loves. _Lee Juyeon_. 

Their relationship wasn't that bad at the beginning. It was full of warmth. The warm feeling that Jaehyun gets when he sit close to the fireplace during winter, with him tucked on Juyeon's arms and a blanket wrapped around them, as they watch his favorite movie on the television. The younger one always insisting the he could pick the movie that he wants and would always accompany him even if they had watched _Iron Man_ a hundred times. It was the combination of the sweet taste of milk, dark and white chocolate ice cream that Juyeon buys him whenever he feels down and upset because he can't win the game he's playing. It was the smell of the sea that he loves because Juyeon loves the sea so much he collects books, watch documentaries about it and what he really loves to do is to bring Jaehyun to see how the sun set when they had the time. Reasoning that he loves seeing the sun set with him by his side, _It signifies the end and the beginning of something and I'm starting and ending my life with you_. It was the sweat gathered on Juyeon's brows as he practiced his own choreography to the song that Jaehyun made for him on their first anniversary as a couple. It was the heat shared between their tangled bodies, dancing to their own rhythm, open mouthed kisses that never fail to leave him breathless, a series of _I love you's_ in between the pants and the _Always so good for me hyung_ that Jaehyun never get tired of hearing. 

But the heat can be overwhelming until it borders on pain. Being too close to the fire gives him burns and Jaehyun tolerates it, but it _burns_. 

It started on a warm July, he was on his way to the studio their company owns to start his work on the new song that he's making. It was a simple pause that he got from Juyeon when he told him "I love you" before he went out. He knows that it wasn't normal but he let it pass thinking the younger one was just tired because of his work. _It wasn't_. The second time it happened was when they were hanging out on his apartment that Jaehyun considers as _theirs_ , he was talking to Juyeon about the cute shih tzu that his parents had adopted and named as Darong, until he noticed the other one clearly not focusing on what he's saying. He paused and asked, "Is everything all right Juyeonie?" Concern visible on his face and Juyeon breaks out of his trance then answered, _Everything's all right Hyung, I was just tired_. He believes him; he always does, so he let it pass. Days, weeks, months passed by and slowly the warmth that they had from the start begins to turn cold. Like the transition of fall to winter, he can't stop it even if he wants to. 

Long nights spent with having no Juyeon on his side. Sink empty of Juyeon's favorite mug where he drinks his tea in the early morning. The smell of sandalwood on his apartment that reminds him of Juyeon slowly fades away. Every trace of the other on the little place that he considers as his home because it was _theirs_ , gone. He loves him so much, he really does. But the pain is slowly and constantly killing him every day, the burns no longer bearable for him, so he did the one thing he never thought he would do. He let go. 

It wasn't easy for Jaehyun. How a big part of his life gets torn away from him but he bears it, even when he saw the tears from Juyeon's eyes when they talked on his apartment and decided that it's time to end their relationship. He held on as the younger one gathered his things on his apartment that he once considered as _theirs_. He goes on even if no one would know that he's gotten used to the _burns_ that Juyeon gave him and he missed it. He burns for him and Jaehyun thinks even if years go by, he will never stop burning for Juyeon.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading, i really appreciate it. english is not my first language so forgive me if i have errors


End file.
